Sunday, 20 September 2009

Enjoy Your Sleep

I can't tell you how fed up I got hearing people tell me to "enjoy your sleep" during my pregnancy. Especially towards the end when I was so uncomfortable that sleep wasn't that great anyway.

Nearly 3 weeks into motherhood and the lack of sleep is beginning to really take its toll. Princess has gotten over her fussy phase of earlier in the week and is feeding, settling and sleeping like a model child. Except... we're still stuck in a 3-hour cycle, which means I am lucky to snatch 2 hours sleep between feeds at night. I try to nap during the day but it's hard - I want to have a life too! Plus I feel obliged to have the house clean and organised and meals ready on weekdays. On the weekend when I'd feel OK asking Milord to take over the housework he keeps scheduling DIY projects so messy and noisy that I'm not even able to ask him to watch the baby so that I can have some grunt-and-snuffle-free nap time (babies are noisy sleepers).

Last night was a killer. Princess was in a 2-hour feed cycle all night. This means I was getting one hour's sleep every 2 hours, and I only got her settled at 11pm after hours of trying to get her down. Cluster-feeding's a bitch. And then... Milord was snoring fit to shake the windows. He's tired too. I don't care! I gave him the whole of Thursday night "off" by sleeping with the baby in her room so that he didn't get woken for 9 hours, and get repaid by stereo husband and baby noise in my sleeping time. Not. Happy.

I moved into Princess' room and so managed a bit of sleep between feeds. At 6am this morning when Milord brought her to me again I was totally over it. I'd had 3 hours sleep all night. I settled into my chair, put her on the boob, and burst into tears.

Oh. My. God. This is so hard. All I need is a decent stretch of sleep, and I can't get it. I know sleep deprivation is a tried and tested torture device, and sometimes it feels like my baby is torturing me!

Suddenly Milord appeared from the bedroom. I hadn't thought I was making much noise but he'd heard the sniveling and came to check on me. The poor guy would do anything to help, I know, but the downside of breastfeeding is that only I can do it. He made me a cup of tea and kept me company until we went back to bed... and then I couldn't bloody sleep!

Maybe I'll nap this afternoon. Wish me luck that Princess starts sleeping for longer periods soon!

PS. I'm fine Dad, just tired. Don't worry ;-)

1 comment:

Lisa said...

Mel. I remember this and how god-damned, mind-numbingly desperately tired you feel. And it is hard giving the baby up to someone else so asking for THAT kind of help, seems like it is not an answer. In the old days - with our mums - they used to have other mums around them, living next door or down the road to help them out.
It does get better. I used to sms my mom during those long long nights and she was so good about always answering although she must have been cursing.
Make a calendar and cross the days off till your mom gets to you. A little bit of sanity and that's all the advice I can give you.
It is hard. But you are DOING SO WELL - Wonder woman mom with a clean house and meals on the table. It was my way of hanging on to my sanity too! lots of love and kisses and hugs!!!!